I’m In Miami Bitch.

The LMFAO song title/post title up top is completely appropriate, since bitch is all I’ve done since I’ve gotten here. I’m on a Passover trip for godsakes, and yet because of some music festival,  The Fountain Bleauughhhh was the set of Spring Breakers mixed with my Yeshivah High School Reunion. Think chicks in thongs and bikinis, wearing HIGH HEELS, by the pool, with a side of Jew in Yeshivah High School Alumni T-Shirt at age 30. I’ve never actually seen anyone do the heels with bikinis before in real life- only Heidi Montag at the pool in Vegas or something.  Sounds fun? Oh yea, I’m with my kids, worrying if they are going to get herpes from the pool water. On one hand I wanted to join in the party, on the other, run and hide. My husband just called me sheltered. ME?!?! Wha??? When a place makes ME feel prudish, you know something is up. But I think this thing is finally over, so it might be safe to venture outside with people under 18.

I don’t know what’s with you Miami, but you and I just don’t MESH WELL. What do you mean WE don’t mesh well?!?!?! Why am I even listening to you? You’re a virgin, who cant drive. (I just let my liscense expire IRL.) WOW, that was way harsh, Miami. Way HARSH.

Look at these pictures and imagine the “UNS UNS UNS UNS” noise in your head.

Despite all that, I freaking LOVE these pictures. I really really do. Love so much I couldn’t edit them down. They are taken with my new Nikon D7100 that I’ve been waiting for for a MONTH. (I bought the D7000 a month ago, and the next day they announced the next version. So I returned it, preordered the D7100, and waited and waited! So worth it!!!) One of these photos need to be printed out in gigando form, dont you think?

On the weekend….

I recommend sending your kids to their grandparents so you can ride your bikes downtown and pretend your kids don’t exist, WHILE actually discussing how cute they are. There’s nothing better than strolling arm in arm with your spouse on a brisk NYC afternoon, nary a care in the world, discussing the intricacies of the levels of cute your children have reached , when you know they are well taken care of and having a blast elsewhere ;) Now that’s a STAYCATION.

OLD PIRATES…

Old pirates, yes, they rob I;

Sold I to the merchant ships,

Minutes after they took I

From the bottomless pit.

But my hand was made strong

By the ‘and of the Almighty.

We forward in this generation

Triumphantly.

Won’t you help to sing
This songs of freedom

‘Cause all I ever have:

Redemption songs;
Redemption songs.

Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery;

None but ourselves can free our minds.

Have no fear for atomic energy,

‘Cause none of them can stop the time

How long shall they kill our prophets,

While we stand aside and look?

Ooh!

Some say it’s just a part of it:

We’ve got to fullfil the book.

Won’t you help to sing

This songs of freedom-

‘Cause all I ever have:

Redemption songs;

Redemption songs;

Redemption songs.

Hello again! So this weekend,  I took a little trip where I thought I would have TONS of wifi, and instead I had very little wifi. Like maybe a strand of bandwidth of wifi… So I disconnected. Got back to “ROOTS COOLNESS” as my yogini friend would say. I felt free again. And what’s awesome is- no matter where you go in the world, if you bring your camera, you can make art. It’s freaking amazing really. I always need an adventure, so one day I paddled out on a paddle board to this distant abandoned structure -with cameras in a surf bag- washed up on a rocky beach, scaled a wall, explored. Oh and that first photo is my new favorite photo in the world of me. In my head, I always look that cool.  Adventures in Awesome. I hope you enjoy!

Colombier, St Barts.

Yea I’m out that Brooklyn.

Now I’m down in TriBeCa

right next to Deniro, but I’ll be hood forever
I’m the new Sinatra, and… since I made it here
I can make it anywhere, yea, they love me everywhere
I used to cop in Harlem, all of my Dominicano’s
right there up on Broadway, pull me back to that McDonald’s
Took it to my stashbox, 560 State St.
catch me in the kitchen like a Simmons with them Pastry’s
Cruisin’ down 8th St., off white Lexus
drivin’ so slow, but BK is from Texas
Me, I’m out that Bed-Stuy, home of that boy Biggie
now I live on Billboard and I brought my boys with me
Say what’s up to Ty-Ty, still sippin’ mai tai’s
sittin’ courtside, Knicks & Nets give me high five
Nigga I be Spike’d out, I could trip a referee
Tell by my attitude that I’m most definitely from….

New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There’s nothin’ you can’t do

Now you’re in New York

These streets will make you feel brand new

Big lights will inspire you

Let’s hear it for New York, New York,

New York.

(I got schooled in the lessons of Brooklyn, yesterday. And it was pretty. Ironically, 15 minutes from where I lived for my entire life, 15 minutes from where I live now, and I need to be shown around like a tourist.)