My little munchkin is 2 today… It feels like only yesterday that I was hideously pregnant, complaining to anyone who would listen (no one) and then sitting in a hospital bed for 12 hours shivering, itching and throwing up while an enterouge of 20 people hung out chatting and saying “It’s been a long day!” (F U!) Only to have the day culminate in a man doing pile drives on my stomach, the threat of C section and then…. the baby!
I am the least maternal person you will ever meet. Despite being the eldest of 5 children, I never looked at a baby with the slightest bit of interest. BUT, the SECOND I saw my girl open her eyes from accross the room (she was getting checked out because of the complications during birth) I instantly loved her. I think I had the opposite of postpartum depression. Despite crying everytime I went to the bathroom for 2 weeks, all I cared about from that moment was protecting and loving my girl. Although I thought I would NEVER breastfeed (I was scarred from my mom and aunts who were like the la leche league when I was growing up) I ended up doing it for almost a year.
At this point, I think I am exactly the type of mother I thought I would be. Calm but totally unprepared. I never had a diaper bag, and I never have extra wipes in my purse….and I am willing to let anyone help me. I do NOT feel compelled to do everything myself. I dont care if she eats ices before dinner. We dont have a lot of rules at my house.
My whole theory (or rather my practice that leads me to call it a theory) is that being relaxed and loving will help my kid be confident and well adjusted. Will it work? Who knows!
The reason why I am even thinking about this is because I went to Borders the other day looking for parenting books. I feel like up until now, I was able to wing it in the parenting department.( Seriously, I think before age 1 all you have to do is keep your kid healthy and loved because nothing else you do will make a difference.) But now, I am toilet training and communicating with her and I want to make sure I dont royally eff her up for the rest of her life. But WHILE I am in the parenting aisle I am already asserting my parenting style by deciding which books to buy. “The Confident Child” YES! ” Intuitive Parenting” PERFECT!
Anyway. Thats my shtick. I’m a lazy loving mother. Is that good or bad? I dont know. All I know is that if I tried to control everything, got angry when she dirtied her clothes, put a bib on every time she ate, Purelled after the park… Well, I would probably be a lot crankier.
Then again, I realize that with just one kid, you don’t really need systems. But when raising a whole bunch – organization is probably the only way to survive.
Are you a mom? What kind of mother are you? Organized? Relaxed? Lazy? Cranky? Go on, you can admit it…